Let’s talk truths! Society alongside with many mother’s have been labeling millions of Father’s as Deadbeats! And not to cover the sky with our hands, We all can agree there are some men (fathers) that  voluntarily Aren’t in their children’s lives much less provide any support and /or have interaction with the child. And those are the men (fathers) that mother’s should go and take the proper measures by going to a local courthouse or resource centers to receive the assistance of child support their child(ren) deserve. This is also where mothers need to take their pride and put it in their pocketbooks and submit those child support needs to a court even if the mother can financially support that child, it is still the responsibility of the absent father to support that child. But let’s continue to mention and raise awareness that many Mother’s also need to have the acknowledgement that The child support received is not for them but for their children’s needs , Many mother’s have the immature  mentality to think that child-support is to cover their personal needs such as getting their manicure, their pedicures , name brand clothing sneakers etc.  Some mothers look at child-support payments made to them as a personal check for having the child with that man the father of those children . And that isn’t so! So they spend the child support money on their personal needs many mothers need to recognize and understand overall be educated on what exactly child support is initially for which is the children!  Child-support payments are for the children this is why it’s called child-support not mother support the funds  of child support sent to mothers is for the child’s  needs only, paying a light bill is for the child’s needs, buying food is for the child’s needs, buying the child’s clothing is for the child’s needs, paying for childcare is for the child’s needs, paying for the child’s education is for the child’s needs etc. those are mainly some ideas of what those child support payments are supposed to be used for. 

Now let’s get to the real Deadbeats that exist and hide behind the back of the courts societies that stands up for their children, Are The mother’s of the innocent children whom keep in in mind didn’t ask neither parent to bring them to this world. Let’s stand up and protect , stand up for those millions of  Father’s who aren’t Deadbeats as society and millions of mothers claim them to be, there are many fathers who want nothing but a relationship with their children even if he’s not in or has a relationship with the mother of his child(ren), And many of these mothers to such Men (fathers) deny any contact with their children, Has the court system failed us ? To always believe and stand up for mother’s ? When in many cases Men have proven to the courts that the mother is or has been denying visitations to them while he makes his child support payments faithfully each month. But that’s another subject.

And so many must be wondering what is a Deadbeat Mother if she’s the one who is raising the child. ? Well the deadbeat mother’s are those who use their children as pawn to get what they want from the fathers and yet not allowing those wanting and willing fathers.  Many mothers believe that they have the authority to decide if and when the father has visitation or be apart of Their children’s lives , and they don’t just because a women has a child with a man doesn’t mean they decide if that man will be apart of that child’s life , fathers have just as much right as mothers over their own children , and some men fathers do comply with those rights and responsibilities. And deal with deadbeat mothers who cry in the courtrooms they want what’s fair but aren’t fair with the complying fathers.. And again we all can agree that , that isn’t being a good mother , a good mother is one who will only keep the children away from the father persay if let’s say the father is a rapist or has voluntarily harmed his own children. And that’s mainly the only time a mother should do everything in her power to not allow the father not to have visitation or contact with their child. Not by denying the willing fathers visitations, and contact simply because their relationship with that man ended or because the mothers don’t get along with the man they chosen to make a baby with. That should have been something the women should’ve taken deep thought to before a child was conceived. Some might say it’s appalling to say such thing but it’s actually called responsibility that every person should take especially when making the decision of having intercourse with another regardless of age.  

 And so When deadbeat mother’s behave and take such unfair actions they aren’t hurting the man, the father(s) of her children , she’s actually hurting her own child by denying them access to their other parent , because as society and many people speak and agree of the importance it is for a child to have a father in their lives. In my own personal beliefs I see it as why is the children of these deadbeat mothers not worthy enough to have a father ? It makes no sense to me as to why mothers would behave like  the way they do towards the willing fathers. 

Boys need a father in their lives to one bond with the man that made him, to have that man father to talk to on subjected matters that a mother can’t understand or know how to handle as a women and mother. To be a role model for that growing boy, to show that boy values that only men carry in their souls, to teach them how to be men overall. 

Girls need a father In their lives to bond with that one man father that won’t ever hurt them as many heartaches and heartbreaks will come within the passing years, to have that role model of what a real man is for when they themselves one day will pick a man to marry and have Children with , the odds of a girl growing up doing the same mistakes her mother once did as to having sex without giving thought that , that man might and will be her child’s father is the same odds that the daughter will one day make for not having a father to show or educate his daughter what type of man they should want to become the father of their children . This is how life cycles of bad decisions repeats themselves in many cases.  It’s important for a girl to have fathers in their lives so they won’t look or think of men though their mothers eyes but through their own. 

So I tell to all deadbeat mothers next time you hold and deny visitation or communication to your children’s father, look at your child and ask yourself … Does my child my baby deserve not to have a father ? And if you love and adore your child / baby enough no mother would deny or take away such blessing to their children. 

Remember mothers it’s your own fault if you choose a thug, immature male etc to get pregnant by and your children shouldn’t have to pay for the decision you didn’t think  thoroughly. And for those mothers who say with a curled lip my baby’s  father doesn’t want anything to do with my child then that’s ok as well take care of your responsibilities as a Mother , but do go make sure that man father of that child pays his dues to child support and again not for your needs but for the responsibility to help you take care of yours.  

For more information on child support follow Link

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