Time doesn’t wait for anyone !
Being able to work with the very ill ,being able to witness what they go through on their last of days, hours down to the last second of breath. Has taught me a lot to say the least, The actively dying all have a sence of when their last day will come. How could they know this ? When Doctors even can only give an estimate of life left. Well I strongly believe that it’s our soul that prepares us our life purpose is to not pass until we see that one family member for instance, And just sometimes our time is up and we leave this world not seeing that one family member for example.. I think we can all agree to my myths and strong beliefs for it has happened to many reading this with one of their own loved ones. So I know it might sound bananas to many but it’s a story I must tell. Let me state that I have been in front of death one time to many for those who follow me and read my articles know all my articles are my own life journeys that I have experienced, As told in one of my past articles I was in a bad vehicle accident mid last year almost taking my life and it properly did because I don’t recall the impact however since then life has totally changed I was blessed beyond words with a few struggles that I can consider just mild headaches knowing what the definition of struggle means so to use it would be out of context and a bit over exaggerated. But it has made me feel as if my life went backwards as if I’m reliving my some experiences of my past. The bad hardships of my past experiences I worked so hard to run away and stay away from, feels like a dream that I’m running away from and I have to relive again no matter how fast and far I try to keep those of my past away. I ever so dread to walk those experiences again , because I know I’m not ready for them I know I won’t make it out this time around. Yes I’m strong but not strong to go through those doors again, it literally frightens me to heavy breathing and anxiety. Down to making me aware that before people passing they must and will relive everything they lived not in experience but by memory a flash in the past so far back to when they were first-born even. I could be grabbing most of these ideas from other articles, and hearing doctors , psychologists, to know some of this is true. And has meaning behind which is the one I somewhat want to find out then again trying to be brave because dying shouldn’t be something to be scared of. It should be a beautiful thing, or so I believe it is. Well truths is I believe that when one passes away that person reaches the golden gates of heaven only to be reunited from their long lost passed family. Where our souls reach a peaceful place where there is no more hurt, pain, deceit, ugliness, etc etc. Everything turns beautiful. So my daydreams, heart beliefs in a higher spirit The Holy Ghost The almighty Father God! Well sticking to subject my gut tells me my days are numbered, that I will pass away within a few years no more then 20 years to be exact. How do I know this something inside me is telling me, my gut , my instincts, coincidentally my past experiences are lingering in my future or so it seems. One thing I know is true is that the living situation I’m experiencing and living now I have done in the past and even in worst situations. It wasn’t the worst of life but it wasn’t pleasant or easy. I was forced to open my eyes to see tons of ugly realities of the world. Before my heart jumps out of chest let me mention that I’ve always been a musical person music soothes me it take me to a happy place I never had besides and now a days music is hurtful at times it can be a love song a happy song and it will get me to tears because they remind me and take me to my past experiences it’s scary makes me think and wonder if this is something that getting closer to death is common and destine to happen.. Even my health has declined a bit due to smoking cigarettes which isn’t acknowledged by a Doctor but it doesn’t take much to see when you are experiencing health difficulties and or declines. Does it scare me No! I always say we all have to die of something right? Whatever it is that my God wants me to go home it will be and I trust him with my life. So it’s the other things that creep me out a bit because I feel like I’m in a race to accomplish the things I want yet in life I feel as my God the one I believe in placed me where I’m at today without having to struggle or stress about the things other people stress and struggle for on a daily basis. I know after my accident it was a wake up call for me and I got the message it was for me to stop and slow down to stop struggling stressing God literally made it known to me all my struggles and stresses of life were to stop to trust him to let go of everything I was holding on to , to let go of the things and like the Bible verse accept the things I can’t change because he is and will be my strength, And yes I have had some struggles and stresses like I mentioned above but those God tells me those are mild headaches and so that’s what they shall be. But it doesn’t answer the part of my days are being counted. Everyday seem so slow apose to what I’m accustomed too fast pace no sleep no rest. Now that’s all I do is rest well try too at least. Because my mind doesn’t stop worrying of those who i adore. I guess the only way to find out the answer is when the time comes because
When it’s time it’s time.